Crash

If the 2006 Oscar-winning movie "Crash" teachs anything, it's that Angelenos are prone to dramatic epiphany after some kind of vehicular clamor.

I don't know if that's true exactly.

Nevertheless, these incidents get you thinking.

****

Last week, I narrowly dodged a barreling car.

It was early evening. I crossed with the light. A car, oppsite of me, right turned onto the street. It didn't slow, even as it aligned with my path. I quickened step. It continued, veering, headlights on my pelvis. I high-stepped, my adrenaline spiking.

The bumper missed me by a foot.

As the car passed -- it was in the wrong lane now -- I spun, eyes fixed at the driver. She was a young woman, cell phone clamped to ear. It was only then she seemed to register my presence.

In protracted time, I watched her lips shape:

"Oh... My... God..."

She never slowed down.

This all happened in about two seconds.

As the car sped away, I imagined the woman expressing the moment to the person on the phone line. At first, in histrionic disbelief. Then, in a millisecond's turn, as shrug-and-laughter as if the incident were some klutzy faux pas. Like burping in church or getting Coke bubbled up your nose.

****

Later that night, I drove home from my office in Pasadena.

Mine was the only car on the road until another appeared, heading opposite way. It was moving fast and without tight control. I veered to the right lane to clear myself from its path.

After it passed, I watched in my rear view mirror. The car turned left without slowing and crashed into a cinder block parking lot wall. No skidding noise. Very little impact noise.

It was surreal how quiet it was.

Once I found an opportune place, I turned around to offer help. By the time I arrived within shouting distance -- perhaps forty seconds after the crash -- another vehicle had already stopped. Its driver was asking the collision man if he needed help. The collision guy, stepping out of his car, waived him off.

His gesture was almost polite. As if he were saying, "No thanks -- I got it!"

I watched collision guy walk to his car's front end remains. He cursorily assessed the damage. Then, he reached into the front seat window and turned on his hazard lights.

He appeared calm. It reminded me of scenes in war movies where soldiers search for their severed limbs, except he showed no sign of injury. Not a scratch.

The car and the wall, on the other hand.

****

We like to believe we can predict our behavior in shocking moments.

I've learned that, while in the moment, I feel strangely calm: hyper-alert, as if adrenaline shuts off all distracting stimuli, enabling my brain to compute only the crucial, life-impacting data. And the info comes at me linearly, time-decelerated as if to ease parsing.

But I wonder if I appeared that lucent to the cell phone woman.

I wonder if I looked to her like collision guy did to me.